07:16 Day 1 of my mamapause journal and around two months into a phase of my life that the medics describe as the perimenopause (interestingly, the word does not exist on predictive text?!).
So, me, hello, I’m Samantha, a working mum and grandma rapidly approaching my 50th birthday and still trying to juggle life with all the pretty standard challenges it brings, but now added to that, the onset of the menopause.
I’m very new to this (blogging and the menopause!) but felt compelled to start writing down my thoughts and feelings mainly to improve my mental health but also to highlight the challenges that women of my age face, usually fairly unheard.
Over the recent Christmas period, I had some much needed blissful time off work. I indulged in some long overdue box sets on Netflix (how had I never watched Luther until now?!) and made an impressive dent in the tin of Quality Street. I also had time to do some Instagram stalking (I don’t do Facebook anymore but I’ll come back to that later). It quickly became clear to me that the social media world is full of women eloquently detailing the trials they are facing with their young families and who are desperately trying to have and do it all in order to appear to be the perfect mother, partner, lover, working mum, wholesome cook etc.
Whilst I have huge empathy for these women (having been through that phase of life myself and come through it one divorce and several courses of antidepressants later) I didn’t seem to see anyone like me – women who have ‘grown up’ children and are still working like idiots, juggling a home life where their ‘babies’ are struggling with pressures such as mental health issues and their own challenges of motherhood.
What jumped out at me is this belief that once these difficult babies sleep for more than eight hours a night and the mum’s are getting dressed before lunchtime, that it all gets easier. Yes, on one hand it does as your babies grasp independence, however (and I’m totally guilty of this) that doesn’t mean you’ve cracked it as a mum.
Hopefully over the coming weeks (if I get my head around this blogging malarkey), I want to share some of the highs and lows of my 30 years as a mum (a newbie in my 79 year old mum’s eyes!). As I enter this new life phase that I wish to rename the mamapause (because to be blunt, what the hell have men got to do with it?!) I hope to make sense of this madness and maybe even find other amazing women who are still doing it all and are relatively sane.
Thank you. Until next time, keep cool and thank God it’s not summer yet (says the woman who prays for sun and could never get warm at night during the winter months!).
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50 year old mum and grandma juggling children, grandchildren, love, work, and the menopause!